Wednesday, July 28, 2010

It's all Mine!

biped...."We got our Christmas in July box from Rachel and the Lady Pug Mugs."

smudge...."It had all kinds of toys and treats, even a biped toy and doggie chews and toys."

biped...."But there was one slight hording problem."

Ollie..."Mine... and this is mine... oh yes, this is mine too. I think it's all mine?"

biped...."Ollie finally relented and let Angel dog have a label off one of the toys."

Ain't she Cute!

biped...."The major is learning all kinds of new things. This week she learned to watch tv.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Romeo, Romeo....

ollie...."Is really UGLY."

smudge...."Where's Juliet?"

ollie...."In Arkansas if she's lucky."

biped....."I was a little startled when I saw Juliet come out from under the porch. (You're never really sure what's going to pop out of the wiggling bushes). I made a dash for the house to get the camera and came out just as a muddy Juliet disapeered into the woods. The batteries were almost shot in the camera and I was trying to spot where in the woods Juliet was when I looked down and a frantic Romeo was running around my feet. He had his nose to the ground with only one thing on his mind, good ole Juliet. When I moved my feet he retreated and I managed to snap the one picture before the batteries totally died."

Sunday, July 25, 2010

It's not Sunday without a Sundaye....

annie...."Well that seems to have put a smile on ole Joya's face."

grandma...."It appears to have put a smile on quite a few faces."

angel...."Nom, Nom, Nom...."

annie...."Did you see that we gots a WHOLE case of Fancy Feast?!!!!"

smudge...."I saw that. Do you think the Biped robbed a bank?"

angel...."You know that she's always looking for a "deal"...

smudge...."In other words she's a cheapskate???"

angel....."Yup. Have you seen that cat on tv that throws a hissy fit and dumps it's Fancy Feast on the floor?"

smudge...."Oh no!... She wouldn't go begg'n for that cat's leftovers would she?"

annie...."It sure looks like it. She even bummed the preety dishes while she was at it."

Sad Sack Joya....

annie...."Why is Joya such a sad sack today?"

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Major Playtime...

biped...."Hey Grandma, have you noticed how the Major's stripes are getting bolder?"

grandma..."Not really, but I did notice that she may have whiplash the way you hold her."

biped...."Nah, She likes to be held this way. You should see the look on her face when I toss her up in the air and catch her as she comes down."

smudge...."Wow Major, she done went and scaird the stripes right off ya."

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Old boy still has it

annie...."Just look at him. We're going to have to beat the girl cats off with sticks."

Wordy Wed...

ollie...."Yes bloggie friends, it's going to be one of those weeks."

ollie..."Please pray that the biped calls the plumber and doesn't try to fix her broken shower."

smudge...."Perhaps we should just have our friends send us rubber rafts, you know she's dieing to see what's inside that broken faucet thingy."

Sunday, July 18, 2010

I hate cats!

joya...."Something is following me."

biped..."No Joya, that's just your tail."

wap wap wap..

joya..."I caught it."

joya...."Woah there buddy! This is my desk and no cats are allowed."

grrrrr grrrrr grrrr

*this is the point where either the biped or grandma jumps up running toward the sound of the grrrs. War is about to begin."


*joya gets as close as possible to her prey. Usually its poor Heesh, who doesn't have a single mean bone in his body. She gets closer and closer, her tail whipping back and forth faster and faster.


***very high pitched scream which most closely sounds like a midnight catfight."

joya...."Oh no, I killed it. Now I'm in trouble again."

*** Joya walks slowly to her bedroom door and waits for the biped or grandma to let her back in."

Joya...."I'm sorry biped, I just don't like cats!"

biped..."Well thank goodness it was just a Heesh look-a-like this time."

biped...."We've changed Joya's free time to after dinner now. It seems to be the best time when Annie (who HATES joya) is on top of the fridge and smudge, ollie and heesh have collapsed in a pile on the sofa. Once or twice a week we have to stop Joya from harrassing someone. As soon as she sees either grandma or me she trots down the hall way to her room."

biped...."I really think that Dr. Phil should devote an episode on Joya. I can just imagine the drama at the end when he reveals to her that she's actually a cat and she slaps him across the stage in disgust."

Sunday in da Ozarks

ollie...."Hey Grandma! Is the biped working on another one of her projects?"

grandma...."Why yes she is sweet heart."

ollie...."Wow, she skittaddled faster than Uncle Bill when you mentioned the "W" word."

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Saturday in da Ozarks

annie...."I love you grandma. You're the bestest!"

grandma...."Whaat do you want?"

annie...."That bagel would be nice."

grandma...."I don't think cats like...."

annie...."Nom, Nom, Nom..,,,,purrrrr"

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Fashion Friday Feral style...

biped...{{sound of typing}} "Formerly Feral Olaf, the Norwegian Forest Cat, models an authentic Norwegian hunter's cap."

smudge...."yee god! She's went and lost her bloody mind."

ollie (aka olaf)...."How embarrassing. All this time I thought that was a bed. Everyone's going to think I'm sum kinda hick."

smudge...."I swear they both got their brains out of a box of Craker Jacks."

The big and little of it...

major..."Don't mind me. I'm just checking out this bed for a compfy napp'n spot."

major...."Hmmm, this side looks a little softer."

major...."Oh yes, I'll have you wrapped around my widdle paw in no time."

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Teaching Joya to Fetch...

biped...."Hey Mom, I think I'm going to teach Joya to play fetch. It might help with her aggression issues."

Joya...."Fetch? What's dat?"

biped throws the ball and the kitchen springs to life

grandma...."Wow, look at them go! It sounds like a herd of elephants."

angel...."Naner, naner, naner...I got to it first."

angel..."Cats don't fetch biped. It's just not natural."

biped...."Abner played fetch. Joya can too."

angel...."From what I've heard, Abner could walk on water."

biped...."Well he did learn to flush the toilet, but he wasn't so hot on walking on water."

biped...."Ok JOya, go get the ball!"

grandma..."Well she has the chase part down pat."

smudge...."She may loose a little weight fetching the ball."


smudge...."No the biped. So far she's the only one that's fetched the ball."

joya...."Hey biped, throw it again! This is kinda fun."

The Deadliest Catch....

Ollie & the Ozark Mtn. Cats....."We interrup our blog today to say a final farewell to our favorite Captain. This season's Deadliest Catch has been the most watched Discovery channel program ever, with over 5 million people watching last week's episode."

Ollie...."If you've never watched it please consider recording it, especially the last three episodes. It is sooo much more than a true story of a bunch of fishermen, but rather a story of the value of life."

Ollie...."As stated by one of his friends, "Phill may of been only 48 years old when he passed, but he lived a 1,000 lives in those 48 years.

Monday, July 12, 2010

It's Baaack

smudge..."Hey brudda, your favorite head rest is back."

ollie...."Can you believe it! She actually put a pillow next to the keyboard and tried to get me to use that."

smudge...."I love the way you bunny kicked it right off the desk."

ollie...."She should realize who's boss around here."

smudge....."Did you check out the tacky blue tape on the moniter?"

smudge...."Speaking of tape did you know that she actually tried to pose my tail so it would cover up the tape?"

ollie..."Some of these biped's have a lotta nerve."

ps...biped..."The tape is used to keep the monitor from tipping over. Since Annie cat is too small to try cow tipp'ng, she has resorted to moniter tipping. One of them was only a few hours old before she nailed it."

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Easy Like Sunday

annie...."Oh hi there. Sorry no one is around today to have their picture taken. The biped's gone to the big city to get the moniter that was fixed. Since it's the middle of the month I'm betting that there won't be many treats."

annie...."It's a good thing you can't see this. Ollie is in the living room doing some sort of happy dance. With the computer hooked up he'll get his favorite nappable keyboard to lay on. Miaow friends. Keep cool and remember to take a nice long nap this afternoon."

Friday, July 9, 2010

To Wap or not

major..."You blew it biped!"

biped..."Huh? What?"

major...."You gave kitty safety tips and you didn't cover bugs."


major..."Yeah, look at my fat lip."

biped...."Ouch, that looks painfull."

major...."You shudda warned me that some flying things aren't wapp'n toys."

biped...."I don't think that the wapp'n was much of a problem as the eat'n was."

biped..."Well I'm happy to say that your fat lip looks a lot better today than it did yesterday little buddy. And just think, it came out a lot better for you than it did that mean bug."

major..."Yeah, but my reputation as a mighty huntress is a bit tarnished."

Finally Friday....

biped...."Hey Smudge, how come you're not snuggl'n wif your brudah?"

smudge..."Cuz cheapskate, you keep the thermostat on 100 and we're about to melt?!"

ps...Well bloggie friends we hope you have a nice weekend. Keep cool and don't believe a word that smudge says. It's not one degree over 80 in our house.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

safety Tips...

biped...."After reading the Furry Dance blog on how a kitten got hurt by a silly chair we thought back and recalled the near misses we've had over the years."

biped...."Maybe everyone else can list some of their near misses in the comments."

biped..."The major is trying her balancing act on the back of my (her) sewing chair. She likes to sit on the back and watch me sew."

biped...."Speaking of sewing there are a lot of wires involved, and cats and wires don't really go together. Annie was our wire culprit in her younger days and we discovered metal wire covers to protect the computers and annie. Now-a-days they've changed them from metal to a styrofoam type material. One of them is shown below. Contrary to what Major thinks, its not a balance beam."

biped...."The real use for these tubes is to disguise electrical wires when you want to put a light on a new wall without having to call an electrian. They come in several sizes to hide from one to multiple wires. There is a slot in the side where the wire can be slipped in and peel off sticky tape so the tube can be descretely hidden.."

biped...."In the picture above, the cord to my foot pedal has been slipped in the tube and the tube has been attached to the table leg. No longer is there a floppy cord to entice the Major."

biped...."Now some of the things that might surprize you. On older dryers there are mulptiple holes for small cats and kittens to explore. Be sure there is no way for your cat to get behind the washer or dryer. Annie cat used up one of her lives by crawling in."

biped...."Make sure there is no gap between the wall and the back of the washer/dryer. Poor Heesh was hiding from my friend's kids and managed to slip behind the washer. Once behind the washer he was unable to get back out. If your washer/dryer won't fit flush with the wall because of hoses/ect, it's very easy to put a shelf that reaches from the wall and rests on top of the washer thus blocking access."

biped...."And that shelf makes a nice place to store cleaning products. I made a cabinet with a locking door to keep the cleaning stuff away from my friend's kids."

Turtle Tales

biped...."Annie's second favorite spot (the first is the kitchen table) is the dining room window. When she spots something her body gets tense and she presses her nose up against the window. Yesterday she spotted this guy."