Friday, July 29, 2011

The Lady with 700 Cats! The Cat House on the Kings

Ollie...."Great News friends! My former foster Mom Lynea is going to be on tv tonight at 9pm pacific on National Geographic Wild. If you can't stay awake that late make sure to record it. Don't mistake the channel either. It's not the old National Geographic with the prison stories, it's a brand new channel. If your cable service doesn't have that channel, you just may have to go visit that nerdy cousin of yours to watch it."

Ollie...."And there's even more news from The Cat House on the Kings! You can spend the night at the cat house, all ya got to do is call and reserve the room, or pull up a piece of drive way if you prefer."

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Project Catway....

smudge...."What are you doing Major? Praying for a new bed?"

major...."No don't you know what started tonight?"

smudge...."Another heat wave? Where in the world are you going?

muffled sounds
major...." I'm hiding. Is she out there? Does she have fabric?"

smudge...."She who? Fabric?"

major...."Don't you remember this time last year when Project Runway started?"

smudge...."Oh my!"

major...."She'll never find me here."

smudge...."I wonder if there's room for me? You never know color grey might be in style this year."

Thankful Thursday....

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Christmas in July ....

Ollie...."We almost jumped out of our skins! Dare was a big Bang! bANG! Bang! on da door, and dumb and dumber exploded into a barking frenzy and a Man was at the door."

major...."Yes there was a man at the door wif a HUGE box from Peggy's Place."

Ollie..."Once da man left we ripped open da box."

major...."Tell it was a huge box. And it smelled like fishes."

ollie...."It was full of beautiful fluffy blankets...There was a purpley one."

major...."And there was fishes that I opened and scattered all over the clean kitchen counter which now smells like fishes."

ollie...."And there was a pretty pink blankie..."

major...."We'll show you more tomorrow but right now I gotta eat these fishies before annie gets here."

Ollie...."Thank the cats at Peggy's place for the blankies."

major..."Thank you Peggy's cats for da fishies."

Ollie..."I never saw any fishies."

Monday, July 25, 2011

ManKitty Monday...

biped...."Joplin you look very serious there."

Joplin...."Biped, I think I saw a ghost!"

biped....."Joplin came over for Sunday dinner with Uncle. He was the purrfect quest (Joplin, not Uncle) and didn't bite anyone. Ollie came over and sniffed a little bit, hissed and walked away. Dumb and Dumber didn't even notice Joplin as they were begging grandma for turkey. Major took a look and decided harrassing Annie would be more fun."

Friday, July 22, 2011

Formerly Feral Friday

biped...."Baby J does not like hands. I think it's part of the feral in him. He does however like arms and will run across the room and jump into your arms."

biped...."He also likes pants with little ties on the cuff. I have no clue why the manufactorer put them on because they're always untied dragging on the floor, now with a kitten holding on to them."

biped...."Yes BJ likes his nip. Remember the pink mouse that BJ drowned? Well I put it outside on the little porch and something came along and took it. Maybe there's a baby armadillo out there playing with it."

biped...."You all have a nice safe and cool weekend."

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Your Weekly Joplin

biped...."Baby Joplin and a can of dust remover. I think I'll contact the dust remover company and tell them they should re-market their product as a cat remover as it sure does. Unlike Major who would stand there defying the puffs of air, all I have to do is shake the can at Joplin and he's running away at full speed."

biped...."Joplin explodes from a quilting project and..."

biped...."almost skidded off the table."

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Wednesday in da Ozarks...

major...."Biped!!! Call 911. We've been robbed. Everything is missing from your desk!"

ollie...."Chill out Major. Da biped cleaned the desk. I'm not sure which is worse. The shiney wood or the lemon smell."

heesh...."Now if we can get her to clean out the bed."


biped...."It is Majorly important to get plenty of rest during the summertime, especially in the middle of a heat wave."

Ollie...."Don't forget having plenty to drink. So don't forget those Niptini's"

Monday, July 18, 2011

The Budget Debate Continues....

biped....Nerves are raw from the constant bickering between the two major political parties. It appears that the Gingers and the American Shorthairs will never agree on the budget and the correct distribution of Temptations."

annie...."We should raise the taxes so we can have unlimited Temptations."

major...."We don't need to raise taxes. We just need to cut back on the treats and eat a few more beans."


annie...."OMC! You wouldn't have that problem if you ate more Temptations and fewer beans."

major...."True, but it sure does help clear out the place when you want some peace and quiet."

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Friday Night in da Ozarks

smudge...."Hey Biped! Bring us another Beer!"

Heesh...."Yeah and don't eat all da ice cream this time!"

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Whats on your bird Tv?

major...."Hey Furriends! Check out whats on Cat TV!"


Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Thankful Thursday....

joplin...."It's thankful Thursday so the big guys told me that I need to be thankful for something. Here I am trying to think about something to be thankful for."

joplin...."Oh Yeah! I got it! I'm thankful for the biped's big ole juicy arm!"

joplin...."Arrhhh! I think I got high colesterol from da biped!"

joplin...."tee heee... did you believe dat high colesterol thing?"

joplin...."Yeah I'm bad... I knows it."

Monday, July 11, 2011

What a Difference....

biped..."a week makes. A week ago saturday I invited my friend over to meet Joplin and to do some quilting out in the sewing barn. Joplin happily entertained us by chasing his little pink mousie, dropping by once in a while to mooch some of our crakers and salami."

biped...."This weekend Joplin entertained my friend by drowning the little pink mouse in his water dish just before sinking his pointy little teeth into her hand."

biped...."For some reason my friend didn't apprechiate my saying "Thank goodness kitty teeth are tiny."

smudge...."It looks like she's trying to choke him biped."

Friday, July 8, 2011

Baby J's check-up

Baby J...."Baby J here reporting on my first trip to something called a vet. I got put in da blue suit case, zipped up and took for a ride with grandma and the biped. We went into a smelly building and there were two huge dogs. One was really old and she told me to be very very scared.""

Baby J...."So I crawled back into da suit case and tried to look real pathetic. The big dogs disappeared but before they left da old one told me good luck and to hide if I got a chance."

Baby J...."Well there I was in my big blue suitcase and this nice lady came in to play with me. Then a HUGE man came in and tickled me. Wow that was scary. Wink wink."

Baby J...."I started giggling and da man told da biped that I was a boy."

Baby J...."While the man wasn't looking I started chewing on the rubber tubes that hung around his neck. Grandma told da biped dat we'd better hurry up and get outta there before they charged her for the doctors toy."

Baby J...."And the bestest part about going to the vet?! We went to Sonic drive-in and had corn dogs and milk shakes. "

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Major Disappointment..

major...."Dear God, please let this be a big box of Temptations."

smuge....."Well whats in the box?"


smuge...."Is it something good?"




smudge...."What's worse than fabric for the biped?"

major...."Books with pictures of fabric."

Cute Baby J...

biped...."With everyone saying that Joplin always looked sad, we worked really hard to get a happy pic, or at least an artsy pic of her last night."

biped...."you're sure a cutie..."

Joplin...."Me knows it."

biped...."And so as not to get too big a head with all the cute shots, we managed to get this one. I can just imagine Harley saying, "How'd they do that?"