Saturday, February 27, 2010

A visit from Cousin Oz.....

smudge...."Hey Ollie, your cousin Oz is outside."

ollie...."I don't have a cousin Oz. What are you trying to pull?"

Heesh...."I'm sure he's related to you. He has a cute pink nose just like you."

ollie...."Oh yuck! It looks like an geriactic skunk. Look at the white streak down it's back."

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Thankful Thursday

biped..."Ollie is very thankful today. He's discovered that Purrzilla (Joya) cannot get on top of the kitchen cubboards to bug him."

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Wordless Wednesday///Not

biped...."I saw an add in the "modern Cat" email today and had to check it out. It is another version of those cardboard scratchy things, this one being absolutely beautiful. (Forget looking for one, unless you're going to take a trip to Japan.) What I loved most in the ad was this particular picture. Look at where the cat is."

biped...."That's a future Ozark Mountain Cat if I ever saw one."

ps... There were pictures of the can in it's bed. It is perfectly designed so that the cat's tail passes thru the gap at the end of the boat."

Monday, February 22, 2010

Guilty Tuesday

smudge...."Annie sure looks guilty in dat picture. She musta been sumwhere dat she didn't belong."

smuge...."Ole Rodger down at Best Buy isn't going to like dis!"

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Don't you wish you were here?

ollie...."Hey!" "What are you humon's doing looking at me?" "Dat was a private message to Chloe."

ollie..."Well I guess you could look at me since I'm not officially taken yet. You just may have a cute gircat friend for me."

Sunday on the Farm...

biped...."Well I thought you might like to see our little facebook farm. I have "saved" over $100,000.00 in less than a week. I quess you can tell there's no fabric stores in Farmville. Very few cats too so there's little need for kitty litter. You have to be quite cuning to get a free cat, otherwise you have to spend real green bucks to buy one, just like it should be in real life."

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Photo Hunt....Cuddly

biped...."Very Cuddly, unless you're another cat."

Thursday, February 18, 2010

So What Lie did you tell?

biped...."Poor Smudge is just about as good as I was when I lied to get my first, very own pet."

biped...."His name was Tom. I named him. He was MINE. I did call Mom from my "boss's house. I was 14 and working as a worm farmer's assistant. My boss had a teenage orange tabby show up and she'd found a sucker to take it off her hands. After an extended conversation with my Mom and my boss assuring her that Tom was definetely a tom, I took off on my bike with "my cat" in a burlap sack tightly tied to the basket.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Rare Seeds for the Garden...

biped..."Fear not dear bloggie friends. Heesh isn't trying to off himself., well maybe he is now that i think of it but only accidently. There was farm grown nip in that bag at one point and Heesh thinks that he'll be more "loveable" if he smells like nip."

biped...."And speaking of nip, we thought for Garden Thursday I'd tell you about one of the Neatest places in Missouri. For those non-Missourians they also have an awesome website. Locally they're known as Baker Creek Heirloom Seeds but their website is called Rare Seeds. Besides having the much sought after heirloom tomatoes, they also have a lot of seeds that originated in europe (especially germany due to our large amish population).

In May they have a festival that draws over 6,000 people from all over the world. They have a huge crafts fair, along with lots of people who are selling all kinds of herbs and plants. That's where grandma bought our 75 cent tree from a little boy.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Purrchance a Boyfriend for Chloe?

biped...."In case you didn't read it, Chloe was forgotten on Valentine's day and is looking for a new boyfriend. That news sure heated things up here on the "mountain"."

ollie...."All you he cats might as well give up. Chloe is going to pick me."

smudge...."Not in this lifetime. She's going to pick me."

heesh...."You're both dreaming. She wanted a BIG mancat!"

Sunday, February 14, 2010

The Kitty Critic

ollie...."biped this is getting rediculous. The piles of junk mail is so high I can just see the tops of my girl friends heads on da computer screen."

biped...."It's not that bad. Just find some taller girl friends. Plus thats not junk mail. It's my quilting magazines. Look here's a picture of you without any "junk" in it.

ollie...."Do you think dat our bloggie friends are dumb? Dey're going to know that you photo shopped all da clutter out of the picture, along wif my beautiful whiskers."

biped...."Wow, that's a neat idea. A computer program that can make all the clutter in our homes disapear. That's something our bloggie friends would love.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Friday, February 12, 2010

Sweet Dreams.....

smudge...."He's going to be really pissed when he wakes up and finds out they were only in his dreams."

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Valentine Dreams

ollie...."Snif, snif, snif,,,oohhhhhhh"

smudge...."That sounds obsene. What are you doing?"

ollie...."I think one of my girlfriends napped on my pillow."
ollie...."Kissy Kissy Kiss kiss."

smudge...."First of all you don't have a girlfriend. So there's no way she could of slept on your pillow."

ollie...."Just wait till tomorrow. You'll see my girlfriends!"

Preparing for the Fin Olympics.

biped...."What in the world are you doing smudge?

smudge...."I'm practicing for the Fin olympics. They're going to have boxing."

biped...."Well you're not going to get many punches in when you're laying down. Actually you look more like a vampire than a pugilist."

smudge...."Oooh, I could bite all da girl kitties on da neck. That sounds a lot more fun."

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Good Bye Captain Phil.....

Da Ozark gang...."Our eyes are leaking tonight because our favorite Captain from the Deadliest Catch has gone to the rainbow bridge."

"Two winters ago he almost died of a blood clot. He went back to work last season even though he wasn't ready. Last week while off loading crab he had a massive stroke.

"Here's Ollie doing his tribute to Captain Phil."

Monday, February 8, 2010

Tuesday in da Ozarks....

smudge...."Grandma? Do squirrels go to the hair dresser every week?"

grandma...."No Silly, what a strange question. Why would you ask such a thing?"

smudge...."Cuz Ms. Squirrel's hair looks just like yours!"

grandma...."Well now that I think about it, most likely she's been waiting a month for a ride to the salon just like me."


ollie...."This sure is a pitiful picture of me."

smudge..."I know it's that darned Farm's fault."

sheesh...."We have a farm? When did that happen?"

ollie...."When da biped discovered Facebook. She spent two hours tonight inviting people to be neighbors."

smudge...."I sure hope that this doesn't become a habit. Dr. Phil had a program on a couple weeks ago about a woman that got addicted to Farmville."

ollie...."I guess that explains how she found out about it."

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Sunday Blahs

smudge...."Our world is going to H&%% in a hand basket. First thing we get up and our blog hasn't been updated. So we bribe grandma for our morning nip tea and settle down with her to read the Sunday Comics."

Grandma...."Where's the Sunday Daisy?"

smudge....."Maybe sumthing is wrong wif the computer. Grandma, go get da biped to fix it."

Grandma... "I'm not leaving this room. Furzilla is out there running free."

smudge...."It's going to be a really long boring Sunday."

ps...biped...."Furzilla, aka Joya is out of her room about half the time now. The dogs are her companions, the cats her mortal enemies. The house is now separtated not by rooms, but levels. Joya and the dogs travel on the floor, everyone else travels acrosss table tops, couches, chairs. It really is embarrassing that all of the cats including the 23 pound heesh are buffaloed by a three pound fur ball."

Friday, February 5, 2010

The Storm

biped...."Ok you naughty tattle tail's. You never told our bloggie friends that I went out and DIDN'T fall down."

ollie..."Well if we'd done that then we would of had to tell them that we were inside with our paws crossed pray'n for you."

Thursday, February 4, 2010

If we only had thumbs.....

heesh...."If we only had thumbs we coulda took sum of da bestest pictures of da biped last night."

annie...."If you felt da earth move about 8:00 pm it probably was da biped's butt hitt'n da driveway."

heesh....."It was all so cool. First da tv quit working because da "eye" on da satelitte dish was iced over. Da biped couldn't stand to miss CSI so she grabbed a towel and slowly crossed da frozen yard to where the new satelite dish sits on da ground. She wiped all the ice off da dish and started back towards da house."

annie...."It was just like slow motion. Her right foot started sliding one way and then her left foot went da other way. And then BOOM she was sitting on da ground."

heesh...."And then she got up on her paws and crawled over to the steps."

annie...."Da biped didn't break anything this time but her pride is bent a little. Oh and da big storm dat was to hit amounted to amount 1/4 inch of slushy ice."

biped...."The next storm is supposed to arrive some time this morning and it's supposed to be snow instead of icy rain. So unless we smell something good cook'n in da kitchen Annie and I will be sleeping in. She decided to go ahead and get a head start."

Frozen Thursday

heesh...."Da biped left us at 3 a.m. to go buy groceries. Today was the first time this week dat we could get da car up to the road. She thought she could wait till noon today and go to the big store but da already confused weather men got really confused as to when the next storm was going to hit. We kept prodd'n her till she gots up and left. No sense taking a chance of running out of diet coke and stinky goodness."

heesh...."So with our pantry full we're going to let da biped fall asleep before we go start scratching on grandma's door. Maybe if we look really cute she'll open a can of stinky goodness for us."

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

How to Massage your cat.....

Tuesday Tosies

biped...."I really think that Annie could get a job as a paw model just like the hand models on tv."

princess (aka dumb)...."Or we could sell her to a traveling circus as a contortionist."