Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Say Hello

ollie...."Say hello to da girls. Dey are a part of our family, so all yee heathen cats quit drooling, and that means you stray dogs that happen to wander by too."

ollie...."If you wait long enough, buy enough feed, you will then get these things."

ollie...."Da biped is a little fraid to calculate it, but she guesstimates dat it costs about $18.00 to make about four dozen eggs. She then sells da eggs to her quilting friends for $1.00 each. OOOps, dat would be one dollar for each dozen."

ollie...."Our girls are very friendly. They let you pet them on their backs. In case you don't know much about chickens, they lay their eggs in their nests. We have four nests and eleven girls and they share the nests. When grandma goes in get da eggs whoever is sitting in the nests stands up and lets her take the eggs. This is quite unusual because chickens are known for being mean and pecking people."

Ollie....."Da chicken above is a Buff Orpington. They are known to be the nicest chickens. We know dis because we had to listen to da biped as she researched "nice chickens", non-pecking chickens, chicken houses, safe chicken houses for over six months."

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Corel Painter Photo Essentials 4

biped..."A few people have asked what photo program I was using for my "Paintings" of Joya. It is a program that can be used just by itself or combined with the Corel Paint Shope Pro Photo X2. It can be down loaded for a free two month trial off the Corel website or from tucows. The "whole" package costs about 89.00 dollars, but if you down load the free trial, and then keep stalling after the time runs out, the price keeps getting cheaper and cheaper. I think I got the Photo Shop program for about $39.00 and the separate Painting program about a month later for $29.00."

biped...."So here is the original picture."

biped..."This is the "water color" version of the picture." One of the coolest things about the whole program is that there is video's on each application."




biped...."This really was't one of the best photos to play with because there wasn't much contrast in it.

Monday, December 28, 2009

The last days of Christmas

joya...."Here's all the Christmas yummies that I got from Angel & Kirby for Secret Santa."

ollie..."snicker....She's going to be really sad when she finds out dat we had a party while she was locked in her room wif da biped."

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Monday Mews

joya...."Joya here wif da Monday Mews. Lets see... We finally got to open our prezzies from Santa. We gots a box full of temptations, picture frame for me of course, a card wif a cute kitty, and da biped forgot what the rest of the goodies were. We'll show you tomorrow."

joya..."hopefully, seeing as biped time is quite different than normal time."

Easy Like Sunday

joya...."This is not a very flattering picture of me cuz da silly biped forgot da camera batteries in da charger over night. So da batteries either fried, or dey froze."

joya..."OOps, I forgot to say dat da charger is in da car and da car is still covered in ice from Friday's storm."

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

The Quiet Christmas

grandma...."Did you invite your brother for Christmas?"

biped....."Yes mother, and Aunt Zimmie, and half the State of Missouri."

grandma...."And NO one is coming?"

biped......"Not a solitary soul. I just don't understand what's wrong."

smudge...."Do you think it's because everyone saw Joya playing in the toilet before she came and drank out of the glass."

The Cat Whisperer

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Christmas at the Shelter

biped...."Well today I went down and "paid" for Joya. I must admit this is the strangest shelter I've ever seen. One huge bag of kitty food and a bag full of kitty toys and Joya was all paid for. I got mugged by this cutie. She let me take pictures of her toesies cuz it was Tuesday."

ollie...."We sure lucked out cuz da biped didn't have enough food and toys to bring dis little girl home. It looked like it was part st. bernard."

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Joya Update

biped...."We thought that you might want an update on Joya's progress, or regress. She still likes her dog and me, but absolutely hates all the other kitties. This is after being in the house for about two weeks. She has a not too good trait of going postal (or would that be hisstal" in a split second if something or someone scares her. I might mention that just about everything including a flushing toilet scares her."

biped...."She spends most of her time in the spare bedroom which actually seems to please her. She comes out when everyone takes their afternoon nap on grandma's bed and plays a little and then back to her room she goes. It's a nice room with a bird's eye view of the squirrels and turkies."

biped...."We've debated taking her back but don't think she'd be that adoptable. We can invision the sign on her cage
....Adult miniture ozark mountain cat
has a few missing teeth.
Hates all cats,
only likes 1 particular white dog,
tends to bite slow moving people when scared,
can change from love bug to Kujo in 2 seconds"

heesh....."Did you see what da biped typed about JOya?"
sheesh...."Yeah sounds familar."
heesh...."If it said something about being over weight it might be a discription of da biped."
sheesh...."Hmmmm, you've got something there."
heesh...."Maybe we could buy them a bottle of Midol."
sheesh..."Yeah and lace it with prozac."

Friday, December 18, 2009

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Naughty Joya

joya..."Iz been a naughty kitten. It wasn't my fault that I was tempted by Amy the naughtiest cat of all."

ollie...."Look at what the devil cat bought wif da biped's plastic card. I wonder if she thinks that she can become a "refined feral kitty" by buying fancy furniture.

joya...."Look what I found on Modern Cat! Isn't this the neatest thing.! It attaches to da computer desk so I can read what da biped is typing."

joya....."Here I am posing like a truly refined kitty. I sure hope dat da biped doesn't mind me using her card. She probably won't even mind that I bought a second Kit-in-Box when she sees that they were on sale."

joya...."Hey Brother! You look really cool!"

biped...."Hey Everycat! Look at the very very refined Joya Amabella

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Goodbye Fall

biped..."Look at what's growing in our yard!."

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Temptation Pieces

biped.... "Oh YUck!" gag... hack...gag...running water...hack hack...sound of toilet flushing....."I can't believe I did that."

Saturday, December 12, 2009

They're BAAACK!

biped...."That's right. My little flying friends are back and this time they let me come into the chicken yard to take pictures of them. I was only four or five feet away from them as they ran up and down the chicken wire."

biped..."Of course grandma is worried that I will be attacked by the pack of killer flying squirrels. I think that maybe she's got the squirrels mixed up wif the racoon from last week's CSI Las Vegas."

biped...."This little guy wasn't real happy with my being there. You could just barely hear him growling. It was almost the identical sound that smudge makes before he lauches an attack on sheesh."

biped....."hmmm, maybe grandma is right. Is that squirrel looking am me?"

Friday, December 11, 2009

Photo Hunt.....Undesirable

biped....giggles...."What a perfect subject in a house of six cats and two woofies."

biped....."Let see there's never ending supply of undesirable dust bunnies. There are snow drifts of white eskie hair and then there is the most undesirable thing of all. The never ending need for copius amounts of kitty litter. AT least thirty pounds in each week and fourty-fifty pounds of undesirables to carry out. Till this week when our Breeze Kitty Litter system arrived."

biped..."The neatest thing about this stuff is that it automatically comes to our house and a nice man leaves it on our porch. And we almost forgot to say that there is no more undesirable kitty litter crunch underfoot."

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

The Line is Drawn...

biped...."We conducted a poll today to see if Joya Amabella (Loveable Joy) should become a part of the Ozark Mountaincat clan. It went thusly..."

Angel...."Oh My Yes, slobber, slobber.. wag.. wag...

(while we were conducting the poll, Angel laid next to Grandma's leg, her front legs flailling at the slick floor. 30-40 seconds later she still hadn't managed to stand up and a worried look came on Grandma's face. Finally she managed to at least sit up when Grandma looked down and noticed that she was standing on her tail.)

Princess...."Joya who? There's another cat?"


Ollie....."a BIG hissy NO"

Annie....."Huh? Whatever..."
(We counted that as a yes)

(we're not sure if she was hissing at Joya or the biped."

Heesh....."Sure as long as we get more Temptashuns."

Wednesday Meet and Greet!

Wordless Wednesday

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Where is our Hepper Chair?

annie.....Remember when Goma had the Hepper Pod giveaway? And you could get a third chance to win by giving the Hepper Pod Peoples a suggestion for a new product? Well our biped suggested that they make a Hepper computer chair, especially made for the comfort of all us kitteh's with big butted bipeds.

annie...."As you can see from the above picture, my very life is in danger. I want to be close to my biped, but unfortuneately there is no "safe" place for me."

annie..."We had the biped suggest that they make a computer chair wif a large (very very large) bucket seat.

annie...."We suggested that the arm rests have interchangeable pouches that would keep our heads (and bodies) from sticking out where we could be decapitated if our biped suddenly decides to "twirl" around and head to the fridge."

annie...."The arm rests could be wider than those on this chair with a soda holder built in. No longer would we get in trouble for dumping their soda into the key board. The soft sided cat pouches would snap onto the underside of the arm rest and snap onto the bottom side of the bucket seat. On the outside of the cat pouch there would be pockets to hold Temptashuns and maybe even a nip pocket."

annie...."Well things are getting a little fuzzy for me, so before I pass out I ask you to send the Hepper People a message if you like my (our) idea for a Hepper Chair.