Sunday, May 31, 2009

A Message to Fin

Giggles....."Life hasn't been easy around here ever since da biped read Fin's blog and found out dat she's looking for a special friend. A special tuxedo colored friend. Ever since she read dat, we had to put up wif a tuxedo colored camera hog."
heesh...."Did she pick a good photo? I tink I see a shadow. Put up another photo biped!"

biped...pause "Ahemmmm."
heesh......"Paweese? Pretty Paweese!"

heesh...."Is dat a booger on my nose? Oh NO! She put up da booger pic. Giggles I don't have a chance!"

Jack or Jill

Meet Jack, or perhaps Jill, our newest oppossum friend. We don't get to go out and play wif Jack, but when da biped isn't looking he sneaks up on our porch and talks to us threw the door. The other night, Jack made the mistake of visiting while da biped was still up. She picked up da flashy box and followed Jack through the yard.

Jack has absolutely no fear of da biped or da flashy box. Obviously he didn't talk to his cousin Jeb who got da pointy end of a pitch fork when he was found in da chicken house. Actually da biped really felt bad about dat when she read up on possums. According to Possum Pop they don't eat chickens and most likely he was just eating da chicken feed. Anywho, da biped waddled after Jack and he crossed da road, nibbled on some dandelion greens (Now da biped has another excuse for not mowing the darned lawn) and then he headed towards da pond.

All of a sudden da froggies started jumping into da pond and Jack disappeared into the bushes (weeds). We don't tink dat he caught a frog dat time cuz of da biped and da flashy box, but he was all wet when she caught up wif him on da other side of da pond.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Wheez, sneeze and grumbles

Our friend Rufus did a review of the Furminator so da biped decided to show a picture of Grandma de-furminating Smudge. If you peek you can see Giggles leg. He was the first one to the table when we got it out. Us kitties are trained to come running when da biped thumps the table wif da furminator. It kinda resembels a Biped family reunion. There's a few that get a bit tipsy (or would dat be nipsy) while standing in line. Then a couple of us get tired of waiting for their turn so we start a fight. Then Dumb and Dumber start shouting (barking) and trying to shove us cats out of the way so they can get combed. Even shy little Sheesh comes out and joins the fracas. If she was a biped she'd probably be the reclusive artistic aunt. When its Dumb and Dumber's turn da biped heads outside. After one time of trying to clean up drifts of white hair in the house, she makes some lame excuse about going green and letting da birdies use doggie hair to reinforce their nests.

We're sorry dat we've been slow posting lately. Da biped is still fighting wif da carpet and da paint and she's sick again wif another cold. This is the third cold since Christmas. Grandma is sick again too. Smudge thinks that she may have furballs from combing his hair but da biped says no, that its some bug thats made them sick. Speaking of furballs, check out dis one. Dats about five minutes worth of brushing on Smudge and Giggles.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

We want Cheesecake!

heesh....."Whose going to tell her?"
smudge...."I think it's already showing in the title."
ollie...."Do you think she'll say yes?"
heesh...."I don't think so. Wif her milk alergy she never buys cheesecake anymore."
ollie...."We don't mean dat kind of cheesecake. We meant da Cheesecake kitty on
Daisy's blog"
smudge ..."But dat kitty is in Florida wif Daisy."
ollie..."Hey maybe we could get Aunt Zimmie to adopt Cheesecake!"
smudge..."Yeah she lives in Florida."
ollie... "We can get da biped to email her. She's really nice and only has three kitties."
smudge...."Hey dey have da extra space shuttle on da pad. She can take dat an zip right down to where Cheesecake is."
heesh..."She's probably not even allergic to cheesecake like da biped."
ollie whispers to smudge...."Sumtimes I think dat da biped dropped heesh on his head when he was a kitty."

Thursday, May 14, 2009

The KFC chicken hunt continues

a very excited Ollie here..... "Quess what we got! A post card from KFC. Remember dat da biped wrote them and complained when she couldn't get the free chicken?"

"They even wrote da biped a note and appologized."

annie...."Da notes hard to read. What does it say?"
ollie...."It says hers's your coupon for a free two peice dinner."
annie...."I don't see a Coupon?"
ollie...."Our coupon is gone?"
annie...."It's been ripped off da card. There's just a little nubbin left."
ollie...."I think it's time to put Dumb and Dumber to work.
ollie..."We can have dem interogate da mailman. I bet he has chicken fingers."

Monday, May 11, 2009

Cody has a new Name!

heesh here......"If anyone wants Cody's address so they can send sympathy cards the biped will be happy to give it to you. I thought my name was bad until Uncle re-named poor Cody. So here it is.....
CLICQUOD.....pronounced Cli-Ko. Uncle (proudly) stated that Clicquod was the dude that invented champagne. We're really worried that Cody's self esteme may be damaged by the awful name, so we've decided to rename him. We really thought and thought not wanting to insult poor Uncle. He can't help it if he's a man and thus name challenged. It probably runs in da family because his father wanted to name da biped "Quits" when she was born. Thank goodness grandma stepped in. So here he is! Our new Cousin...."

"Baby Bubbles"

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Our New Cousin Cody

"Uncle called this morning wanting da biped to pick him up so he could get his new "boycat" By da time da biped got her camera turned on, Uncle had "Cody" (wasn't there an outlaw named Cody in da ole west?)in our old carrier and we were on da way to da car. It was Caturday at da animal shelter so uncle got him for half price. He's all fixed and up to date on his shots and is a little less than a year old."

The day Missouri blew away

"ollie here! We're recooping from da big storm dat hit us yesterday. It was very scary and dark and then the rain came! And then the wind came, and then the rain and the wind killed our lights for a whole day. It only lasted about a half hour but it did a lot of damage. Da biped went out and took pictures. Da storm covered about a 100 square mile section of Missouri. Our home is ok, and most of our trees survived, but a large part of our state is really hurting. One poor man died of a heart attack after being thrown from his house."

"Here's a picture of our neighbor's trees."

"Here's an old trailer which lost it's roof. Its about 20 miles from our home. It was really a miracle that more homes weren't hit. The people were lucky because they weren't home."

"here's another view of da trailer. A smaller tree fell on da front end."

"The news said it was a bunch of thunderstorms and not a tornado that came thru our area. He said that it was more like the kind of winds that come from a hurricane." "When the storm left us it got stronger and turned into several tornados."

"Here's a tree on our property. Mr. Squirrel is checking it out. We lost quite a few of our big oaks. Does anyone need any fire wood?" Our home sits right in da middle of our forest so we count ourselves very lucky that none of the trees that are close fell over."

"you can see how the wind twisted this tree off at the ground. It's about a half mile from our house. It's on da biped's other peice of property."

"Below is another tree that tipped over. It missed our neighbors house by about 20 feet."

"We're hoping dat all our Missouri cat friends homes are ok and dat there homes didn't blow away."

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Our New Dog...... bed

Reporter ollie here...."This is our new dog......bed that the biped bought for Dumb or Dumber. Neither one of them like the new hardwoodish floors. Our new dog Heeshish (who looks an awful lot like our old cat Heesh) really likes da new bed and he won't let his sisters dumb and dumber lay on it. Da biped has now gone out and bought a new rug for the dogs to lay on. Its a very pretty red. I think I'll look very handsome on da red rug. We'll let you know if I get it or da dumb dogs."

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Our Rich City Cousin

ollie..."Look what our silly city cousin got from her papa!"

ollie..."Its a three story cage wif hammicks. Uncle puts her in it and den he sits inside da house and watches her as she tries to catch the birdies that land near her." "If you look in da window you can see our silly cousin Shredder." "If you are thinking dat's a dumb name, well we all agree wif you." "Da biped likes it better than the first name that Uncle gave her. At first her name was Lindy (da biped's name, sort of). Uncle said Shredder was just like da biped. She likes to play all night and sleep all day"

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Do cats get hang overs?

ollie to heesh...."Have you seen Smudge?"
heesh.... "He's face down in da litter box."
ollie..."Do you tink he's alive?"
heesh..."Let's poke him"
smudge...."Moan..." "
ollie... "I tink dat da pawty tat had too many tequilla tacos"
ollie to heesh...."Hey look the dead has risen!"
heesh.... "Sumting is wrong wif him?"
ollie..."You mean da kitty litter on his nose?"
heesh...."No, dat he has his head screwed on backwards"
ollie...."You're right, dat must really hurt."

Monday, May 4, 2009

It's Pawty Time

smudge...."Biped, get in da kitchen and start dos tacos!

Hey! There's a thief here.

ollie...."It was sauna day. The warm sheets were laid out on da bed. Da biped had just finished my massage and then suddenly I was
ATTACKED by a grey sheet thief!"

ollie... "Biped! Da sheet thief is trying to steal my warm sheets!"
willie..."Da Sheet Sheriff here! Relinquish dose sheets or I will melt you wif my laser eyes!"
biped....."If you two don't quit fighting I'm going to wiggle my nose and turn you into frogs."

willie...."Ollie is dat you?"

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Quacamole Recipe

..."Inspector Ollie here making sure that all the ingredients get in da bowl and not in da biped or worse yet, Dumb and Dumber.

"Above is a picture of all the ingredients, except for da mayonaise." "Da biped is making enough Quacamole for 3 people so she got 2 huge avocados. You'll notice in the picture below dat there is no brown spots (bruises). This is because she got the hard ones and let them ripen naturally."

"She cut da avocado's in half, and then scooped dem out wif a big spoon and put dem in da bowl. She threw da pits in da compost bucket. (Some peoples tell you to put da pits in da bowl to keep da quacamole from turning brown but dats an old wives tale."

"She takes a pinch of da cilantro and chops it up very finely. It plays a big part in flavoring da quacamole, but is rather strong if you get a big chunk." "Dat goes into da bowl along wif a clove to two of garlic which has been crushed on cut up really really teensy."

"For our "dip" she put less than a tablespoon of the cilantro." If Cilantro was a character in a play, she would have a walk on part. You can see her, but she's in da background."

So to refresh,
you have a bowl wif two avocado's, a pinch of cilantro (finely chopped), garlic and then you cut your lemon in half and squeeze (carefully no Seeds Please) about a teaspoon over the ingredients in da bowl. Do the same wif da lime. Cut in half squeeze about a teaspoon." These two characters (Lemon & Lime) are walk on's too. Dey give a little flavor and keep your quacamole pretty green.

"Then da biped cuts up da jalapeno and puts it in da bowl. She cuts it very finely. She only wants da flavor and not da heat. This is why she doesn't give traditional ingredient measurements. Some like it hot and some not so its up to da cook."

At dis point da biped takes da potato smasher thingy and mashes it all together. She doesn't want Grandma to take a big ole dip and get a whole bunch of peppers or cilantro.

"Da yummies in da bowl have all been mixed together and da biped adds about three quarters of da tomato. This is where our recipe varies from da resteraunt ones. Da biped was taught to make quacamole by a real authentic Mexican. Now she's not sure if he learned how to make it from a real Mexican or perhaps he really wanted to bug his mother and added tomatos to aggravate her but whatever it was, it makes da quacamole come to life!" "She also cuts up and adds da green onions. She likes da smaller, younger green onions and uses two or three tops and just a little of da white part. You quessed it, da onion only has a minor role too." She adds a couple heaping tablespoons Pace Picante Salsa and three or four huge tablespoons mayo.

"She gives da lemon and lime another squeeze being sure no seeds fall in and then mixes it all together. She adds a little black pepper. If she's going to serve it with low/no salt chips she adds a little salt. If she's using regular chips she skips da salt."

"She stirs it up and den squeezes a little lemon juice on top. She's still working wif half da lemon. She then wipes da sides of da bowl so there's no chance for it to turn brown. She says to stir it one more time just before you serve it."

"Refrigorate da lime, lemon, cilantro, and extra onions in a plastic bag because you'll be using them again if you're going to make da chicken tacos." "Purrz, Ollie!"

Friday, May 1, 2009

Fluff and quacamole ingredients

It's a rainy Missouri day so we can't take any Mayflower pictures. Instead we have a picture of Smudge making bread in Willie's belly. Da biped thought you might be going to the store in the next couple days so you'll need the rest of the ingredients for your quacamole. So here goes!

a lemon
2 limes
1 jalapeno pepper
a bunch of cilantro (it kinda looks like parseley)
a small bunch of those bunch type tomatos (or 2 nice ripe tomatos)
a package green onions
a garlic bulb

a medium sized jar of chunky (MILD) Pace Picante salsa (unless you already have salsa)
** a package of cream cheese (optional)
a bag of Resteraunt Style Corn chips (do not get the doritto (flavored) type. You don't want to mask the taste of your quacamole
* a jar of mayonaise (I use the light variety)

** The cream cheese isn't for the quacamole, but rather is used with the left over jar of Pace salsa to make another yummy dip

Now these addtional ingredients are requested by Heesh, who is still miffed about the chicken incident earlier in the week.

1 huge or 2 nice sized roasting chickens (makes enough for 2 humans and 7 cats)
1 package corn tortillas
1 package grated mexican cheese or cheddar cheese
1 small can diced Green Chiles (be careful to get green chiles and not the canned jalapeno's) (If you buy the Ortega brand you'll see a little thermometer on the can. It will be just above mild heat)

Heesh suggests that you bake the chickens for your normal Sunday dinner. Enjoy!

On Monday allocate removing the left over chicken from the bones to your servant. Be sure its shared it with your feline friends. (I believe that Heesh requested the second chicken so that there will be plenty to share).