Friday, October 28, 2011

Quess What!

joplin...."Do you notice the frown on my face?"

joplin...."The biped has one too."

joplin...."Do you notice that I'm wearing a coat?"

joplin....."The biped has one too."

joplin...."Wanna take a quess at what went snap, crackle, pop and smelt really bad about 4 am?"

Thursday, October 27, 2011

We have heat.....

biped...."for now. How long it will last is a mystery. It took three visits by the repairman plus he spent saturday and sunday at home drawing diagrams of the heater. He even drew diagrams while he was fishing on Saturday. Following is Joplin's interpretation of the Heater Whisperer who laid on our floor for hours talking quietly to the heater."

Joplin...."The man was a contortionist. He was real nice but kinda dumb. He laid on the floor right in the way of our food dishes. At first Grandma said, "Don't bother the nice man. He's fixing our heater. Then after a while she said why don't you get in there and help him."

joplin...."This is what grandma looked like after his third visit."

joplin....."This is what the poor man looked like after his last visit."

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Thankful Thursday....

Joplin....."Look at my new bed! I used to have to sleep in a crummy basket and now I get to sleep in a huge bed."

joplin...."I think I'm going to invite my new friends to spend the night.

Joplin...."Boy they sure were quick taking me up on my offer."

All Hissy in da Ozarks

major...."I am no longer the baby. Life will never be the same."

annie....."What in the world is that?"

major...."I wonder what will happen if I wap it?"

smudge...."Don't think that you can distract me with a fake bug. There's a real intruder in our house."

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Ozark Bun Warmer

smudge...."I bet you quessed that Uncle didn't fix the heater. He only had time to fix one thing so he worked on the leaking tubs. He had to take the faucet off grandma'ss and there was a little slit in the tub where the water could leak. A little sealant handled that problem. Since we had it all apart we bought grandma a new faucet. Well I guess I'll get back to the bun warmer. Oh quess who moved in for the winter. Yep baby Joplin is making himself at home in the biped's bed. It may get kinda ugly about midnight when Annie comes to claim her spot in the bed."

smudge...."Oh yes, we'll be careful not to burn our bums. The little heater swishes back and forth so we don't get too close."

Monday, October 17, 2011

Surprize visitor

ollie....."Handy Uncle surprized us wif a visit. Please say lots of purrz for him dat da biped doesn't work him to death fixing all da broken things around da place. If we're lucky he'll be able to fix the deaded heater."

smudge...."I'd give him a whole pack of Temptations if he fixed it. Dat is if'n I actually had a pack."

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Don't you wish you were an Ozark Mtn Cat?

annie....."It's good to be me."

annie...."There that should do it."

annie...."No way will the biped take it away from me now."

annie...."I gots cats slobber all over it." "Don't worry peeps. It's a good sucker. It's orange cream."

Friday, October 14, 2011

Friday Night in da Ozarks

major...."Hey biped! Did you buy plenty of ice cream?"

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Thankless Thursday....

major...."Hmmmm, brother Ollie in camoflage."

major....."Giggle....he thinks I can't see him."

major....."get ready...set....."


ollie...."Trust me, you'll pay for that!"

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Find Wally...

biped...."ok it's not Wally. It's the recyled Joplin hiding in my reuseable grocery sack which has been repurposed as a fabric storeage system. He must of heard me mumble under my breath, "I'll put the fabric in here so the brat can't get hair all over it." because as of last week its his favorite hiding spot."

Monday, October 10, 2011

Basket Case

Joplin...."Oh noes, we're not talking about me. I'm just trying to snooze in dis basket. Da real basket case is sitting at her sewing machine making a Christmas decoration. She's going to teach a class Thursday morning on 10 minute quilt blocks."

Joplin...."I'm really happy that I'm still over here in the cabin cuz it's not going to be pretty when she has to get up at 8 am.

Joplin...."I hope she doesn't bite anyone in her class."

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Men in Trees

smudge....."We had excitement last week." We had men in our trees."

ollie....."Men in trees is very expensive. This post should be called Vanishing Temptations."

smudge...."But its for our own good. At least thats what the biped says."

biped....."Every winter we have at least one ice storm. Ice storms happen when the temperature hovers between 28 to 33 degrees. Any colder and you'd have either sleet or snow. The precipitation comes down as a liquid until it hits something like a tree or power line. Once it hits it immediately freezes. The power lines sag and the tree limbs get very heavy and they start breaking. The limbs hit the already stressed power lines and all of a sudden you're sitting in the dark. Here in the Ozarks the power can be out for a week to ten days."

biped...."And contrary to what certain kitties say, it doesn't cost any Temptations to get the trees near the power lines trimmed."

ollie...."That dead tree is no where near a power line. The man cut down the dead oak tree after you begged him."

smudge...."There goes my dead oak tree. When I was a widdle wild cat I used to run like the wind and climb to the top of dat tree."

ollie...."All gone. And then they started this really loud machine which ate whole trees."

smudge...."It was so embarrassing to hear the biped talking really sweet to the tree trimming guys."

ollie...."Then the biped asked the man to trim the trees so we could look out in the forest. We can see the momma deer now."

ollie...."Then they fed all the trees to the chopper machine and the truck filled up with oak and pine mulch."

smudge...."That's a whole tree that the man is putting in the machine. It took less than a minute to chop it up."

ollie...."Yeah and it took less than a minute before the biped started finigel'n how she was going to get all that mulch for her garden."

smudge...."Totally embarrassing. You shoulda seen her trying to sweet talk that guy."

smudge ...."And sure enough the man dumped a whole truck load of mulch in our yard."

smudge...."And just when we thought it was safe to show our faces we heard this conversation."

ollie...."Totally embarrassing."
biped...."Uh is that brush hog down the road part of your crew?"

man...."Yeah that's ours."

biped..."Could it possibly make a detour to our yard and widen our driveway?
(the brush hog is a machine that tears out and shreds large bushes and small to medium sized trees. They use it to knock a path to the power lines so their other equipment can get in. Almost every male Ozarkian has a brush hog and he will clear your land with it for $50.00 an hour. This isn't so bad except he wants a guarantee of 8 hours work to show up."

smudge...."That's a lot of Temptations."

biped...."Anyway the nice man said...."

man...."I'll see what I can do."

smudge...."And when da biped woke up the next morning the driveway was all cleaned up which is good."


smudge...."Yes, da man in da delivery truck can now find our house when da biped orders our Temptations."

ollie...."When? You mean if don't ya?"

smudge...."A mancat can dream can't he."

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Wordy Wed.

major...."Quess what I'm doing?"

ollie...."Ummmmm, doing an imitation of the biped?"

major...."Dang it! You get it right every time."

ollie...."The snoring always gives you away."